How can a guy be raped?
If I am sexually assaulted by a man, does it mean I am gay?

Most statistics about the number of males that are sexually assaulted are estimates.Many men don’t come forward because they fear no one will believe them. The myth that men can’t be assaulted and gender scripts pressure men to stay silent about sexual assault.

Men may feel they can’t say no because they are supposed to want sex all the time. Men may feel they are supposed to be strong and able to defend themselves at all times, especially against a woman. These myths keep men from acknowledging what happened to them and getting help.

Some men may blame themselves for the assault because their bodies may have responded to the assault with an erection or ejaculation. It is common for men as well as people of all genders to physically respond with sexual arousal even though the sexual contact was forced or unwanted. Our bodies naturally respond to touch but it does not mean we wanted the contact or it was a sign of consent. If you were assaulted, it is not your fault, no matter how your body responded.

Homophobia keeps men silent too. Men may fear being identified as gay if they were assaulted by a man. Men may not report an assault because they fear homophobic responses by police.

Gay men and youth are also sexually assaulted. Being gay does not mean a person is asking or deserves to be assaulted.

Being assaulted by a man does not determine your sexual orientation.

If you are a man and have been assaulted, it is important to reach out for help. Not dealing with the assault or abuse can lead to difficulties with relationships, rage, depression, and possibly suicide. Most sexual assault centers can give men information about where to get help. Some places have services especially for men.

If you were sexually assaulted, remember:
It’s not your fault. You didn’t deserve it. You can heal.

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